"Yes, you can. You can meet the love of your life. You can meet them in a bookstore, in a coffee shop, at a party, at a bar, through friends of friends, on the Internet, whatever. The trick to finding this person though is to never resign yourself. Never let the lonely days swallow you up, never accept that you’ll just be one of those people who doesn’t get to be loved. Because the second you start believing it, it can become true. That’s the scary part. How quickly days can turn into years. Just like that. I’ve always said that the whole “love comes to those who aren’t expecting it” is BS. Who ISN’T expecting love? I didn’t expect love for two solid years and guess where it got me? Celibacy. You should always expect to be loved, you should always expect to find somebody to love because if you don’t, you do get your worst fears confirmed and then you’re a goner. Then you’re denying yourself what you deserve. What you can certainly have."
Brit Marling - Art Director: Marina Ansell Photographer: Ben Morris
This speaks to me on a spiritual level
gpoy for the last three weeks!!!!!
rachelsmizo said: Hello, I don't mean to be a creep but recently our mutual friend, Eric Kwong, linked me to your post about why you quit med school. my first interview is next week. everything that you said really hit me. While preparing for interviews, I can't help but think about how overworked medical students and physicians seem and am starting to wonder if i really know where im going. i am out of space! but i just wanted to let you know that you make sense. ps please dont think im a creep!
Hey, no worries. I have a public blog, so you’re welcome to read, listen, look, and comment. In my opinion, the healthcare system - including medical education - needs huge reform.
But it’s something that you, yourself, need to think critically about. Eric may be able shed a little light but I encourage you talk to other med students and doctors’ experiences, as well as try to understand perspective of frontline nurses, administrators, and public health professionals. That way, you know what exactly what the field entails. Personally for me, being a doctor didn’t fit my values and my vision of what it meant to be fulfilled person, but I also know that being a pre-med takes a lot of hard work. So even if you get in and need time to think about it, don’t be afraid to ask for a deferment. I hope it all works out for you, and good luck on your interview.
I appreciate your message.
I’ve gotten a lot of positive feedback from the post I wrote yesterday about medical school, but this was the nicest one yet…
"But it takes a lot of courage to actually get into a career that you are passionate about. And a career that is capable of shaping you into the best version of yourself. If you have that choice, why not make the best choice for you and ultimately everyone else around you?"
"I know you’re gonna go far, Anne! From this one decision alone, you’re going to make a big impact. I’m proud of you for your courage and determination, girl! You should be damn proud of yourself, too."
Again, I am reminded every day of why I’m on this journey.
What I didn’t write about in the last post was about how hard it was to hear people say they thought I made a mistake or how many times people told me they couldn’t believe what I did. Literally, people thought I was lying until I started my public health program. But it’s friends like this that really see who you truly as you really are and encourages and reinforces you to become better. In fact, she often forgets that I was ever that pre-med at all because there’s so much more to life than our career.
I overheard one of my freshmen say to his friend, “I wish this were the only class we had to go to,” as he was walking in. Is this real life?? 😍
This is why teachers should be paid more :)
"Don’t live the same year 75 times and call it a life."
Robin Sharma (via stay-ocean-minded)
Why I Didn’t Go to Med School
As some of my good friends know, a few years ago after graduating, the wheels starting turning in my head in regards to whether med school was for me. Up until then, I had excelled academically, received endorsement from many prestigious individuals (which I will always be grateful for), and did enough extracurriculars to get into three MD programs. But being honest with yourself, I think, takes a lot of courage.
And I wanted to be that kind of person. A courageous person who strategically evaluates their choices and whether those choices will lead them on the right path to their GOALS - which for me, meant making enough money and having enough time to support/create a good, healthy family by doing something I am good at and passionate about, i.e. healthcare.
And in wanting to make an impact on people and healthcare, I educated myself about it. During my two years off, in my free time, I read books and watched documentaries and researched journal and talked to people. I realized on my med school interviews that the typical med school applicant knows very little about the changing healthcare landscape and what payment reform would mean for their career. In this way, I felt a gaping disconnect between the typical incoming med school student and myself. I just felt out of place, like I didn’t exactly fit in.
I also I knew that being a doctor didn’t mean that I was going to save lives on a daily basis unless I became an ER doc or specialized in oncology or something – which I wasn’t going to since I wanted to be a PCP for low-SES populations. And how would I feel if I were actually the one contributing to the problem (e.g. medical error, hospital infection, spending less time with patients, readmission)?
Moreover, I’d be happy to make a good name for myself but could care less about prestige. Why then, couldn’t I be a teacher or social worker, who would have the potential to positively affect so many more lives than a doctor? (Oh yeah, because society actively undervalues them by underpaying them.) Not that I could be a social worker or teacher anyways since I don’t have the guts/patience to do it. #respect
I wanted to make money to support a family, but medical school would have put me 200K in debt. It is also not exactly conducive for starting a family. My dad’s a doctor so I would know firsthand what that would be like.
But what about my intellectual ability and Type A personality? Didn’t that prove that I was meant to pursue medicine? People said that I was doing myself a disservice and others by not going into the field, which was flattering. However, in my research I learned that perfectionists have magnitudes higher risk of depression and suicide in med school compared to other types of students… which is probably why at every med school I interviewed at, you have to sit through an hour of them talking about how there are psychiatrists and “resources” specifically for med students’ behavioral wellbeing. (Besides, couldn’t I be good at other things besides memorizing anatomy and understanding immunology? Aren’t I a much more dynamic and multi-faceted person than that? I’d like to think so…)
There’s this old quote I saw somewhere that said something along the lines of, the world doesn’t need you to change it, all you need to do is change yourself and try to be a better person. Personally for me, I don’t think that being a MD would necessarily make me the best person I could be. For some people, it would… but for me, I think it would have turned me into the worst gunner and insomniac.
So I have so much respect for those who went into the medical field and came out of the other side with as much compassion as they had coming in. And I wish you luck to all the applicants who took an honest look at yourself and know in your hearts and minds that this is the right path for you.
You know, maybe I was too realistic for my own good. But every time I think that, I am reminded of why I did what I did.